Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Who Rang That Bell?!

I love the Wizard of Oz. As a kid, I think I probably watched that movie at least 100 times (a week). And I remember always thinking "Jeez, what a crab" about the guy who answers the door when Dorothy & Co. reach the doors to the Emerald City. "WHO RANG THAT BELL?" While, yes, he is supposed to find out the answer to that question, you'd think maybe the greeter to the sparkling green paradise would have a little more patience and class while performing his duties.

I realized something this weekend, though. That poor door greeter, it wasn't his fault. He was just sick to death of political supporters and politicians themselves ringing the doorbell. He was probably incredibly relieved to see a walking talking bag of straw and trembling feline instead of some suited-up, fake-smile wearing liar toting enough literature to have single-handedly taken out half of America's remaining trees.

Ah, campaign season...

I have never been terribly interested in politics. I vote. I spend some time getting to know which candidates are which. A lot of what I base my vote on is purely gut - do I like the candidate, think they'll try to do their best, etc. - because regardless of whether or not they agree with me on issues like big/small government and federal spending, whatever, if the person is of faulty character, they're not going to get the job done anyway. I've tried to ignore the mountains of junk mail I've received from both political parties in the recent months, but after I cleaned up our piles of mail this weekend and filled our indoor recycle bin TWO TIMES with a majority of political fliers, I'd had enough. That is why when we received multiple calls to our cell phones and personal visits to our house (during nap time, no less), I found myself shouting, "WHO RANG THAT BELL?!"

You know what? As soon as one of them shows up wearing ruby slippers, I'll be happy to talk them. Until then, "Nobody sees the wizard!"

Saturday, October 2, 2010

The Toddler Mommy Bill of Rights

I was celebrating one of my small victories this morning (namely, convincing Anna that going to the grocery store was in fact a cool enough reason to leave the library where puzzles, books and coloring sheets abound), and it got me thinking: There are some "rights" that Toddler Moms should just automatically be awarded. So here's my stand. For Toddler Moms everywhere!

We hold these truths to be self-evident:

1. That all moms deserve a day to sleep in without children prying their eyelids open with sticky syrup fingers before the hour of 8 a.m.

2. That as a mom, I am allowed to go out in public unshowered/with food on my clothing/with my pajamas on WITHOUT being judged. As long as I have my kid along with me.

3. That ketchup IS a food group in our house (whether I want it to be or not!) but I can still serve good food (as long as I'm OK with watching Anna put ketchup on it).

4. That someday, maybe, the interior of my car will be leather or cloth, instead of what it currently is : Cheerios.

5. That if my muscles really hurt from my last workout, I'm allowed to eat an ice cream sundae. Or two.

6. That no matter how crazy this kid is driving me before bedtime, I'll miss her the instant I close her bedroom door. And I am allowed to hover outside her bedroom door to determine whether or not she's "asleep enough" for me to go in and peek at her.

7. That moms are allowed to forget the bad things and remember only the good (Mommy Amnesia!).

8. That being a mom is both the most rewarding, fun, exciting AND challenging, frustrating, exhausting challenge we've ever encountered. And we are allowed to feel all of those things AT THE SAME TIME.

Cheerio Mom

Amendments welcome!